Become a Brontë for the weekend in Haworth, West Yorkshire
Heathcliff Cottage – Haworth, West Yorkshire
Sleeps: Six
Price: Seven nights from £565
The aptly named Heathcliff Cottage is a traditional stone-built retreat set in the heart of Haworth, the village where the Brontë sisters resided.
Complete with subtle nods to Emily Brontë’s Wuthering Heights, including inspired artwork, it’s the perfect base for fans of the story. Beautiful interiors add depth and character, including exposed wood and stone, as well as luxurious colour schemes.
The Yorkshire Moors, where Wuthering Heights is set, are within walking distance of Heathcliff Cottage, and guests can also explore the independent shops of Haworth before popping into a local pub or café. There’s also the Brontë Parsonage Museum, which holds regular talks, exhibitions, and displays. (Daniel Smith)
A bookshop owner says customers wanting to buy a copy of Wuthering Heights because they think it is a "bonkbuster" are "going to be seriously disappointed".
Demand for Emily Brontë's magnum opus soared after the release of Emerald Fennell's film adaption starring Margot Robbie and Jacob Elordi.
According to Penguin Classics, sales of the 19th Century gothic tragedy went up by 469% year on year in January 2026, with 8,795 more copies sold.
But Suzie Grogan, from Framlingham Books, warned that any shoppers hoping for the novel to be as raunchy as the film version might end up feeling shortchanged.
"I'm going to tell you, if you're looking for a bonkbuster, you're going to be seriously disappointed," she said.
"There's so much naughty stuff in it (the film) and, to be quite honest, Emily Brontë must be turning in her grave in Howarth [sic] at the idea of it, frankly." (Sarah Lilley and George King)
And yet sales of the novel went up by 469% as reported above, so perhaps she's shining a light instead.
Was it a dare? A mistake? A figment of this writer’s imagination? None of the above. I have seen all two hours of this cultural artefact, and trust me when I say that it is the most memorable feature-length adaptation of the novel that has ever been made. It may also be the worst, but that is beside the point.
Vanishingly minimal choreography, plastic rocks, two very bad wigs, and an incongruously jaunty soundtrack make this production what it is. The acting excels at loudness. The makeup excels at the colour brown. Richard does a lot of arm tossing, like a mime who’s been tasked with depicting the slow, excruciating death of a rapidly deflating blow-up doll, but unlike a mime, however, he makes a lot of sounds, some of them musical, some of them not. He is fully committed, and it is one of the bravest performances I’ve ever seen.
Richard has been obsessed with Wuthering Heights ever since he read the novel as a kid, but it wasn’t until he hit his fifties that he had time to do something about it. Emily Brontë’s 1847 story follows the destructive love story between Cathy Earnshaw and her adopted foundling brother Heathcliff. After she marries a wealthy neighbour, he dedicates his life to seeking revenge on everyone in her family. It’s dark, violent, and nasty, three words that do not come to mind when thinking of the crooner behind ‘Miss You Nights.’
Still, by the early 1990s, Richard was itching to get back into acting. Those who only know him as the Christian-adjacent chart-topper might not be aware that in the 1960s, he was consistently beating James Bond at the box office with his series of promotional musicals. In the ‘80s, he took his acting qualifications to the theatre to appear in the intergalactic space musical Time, which was roundly panned by critics but was a hit with his voracious fanbase.
Ready to tread the boards once more, Richard finally acknowledged what had been lurking in his heart since boyhood. “There was one dream role that I longed to play above all others,” he wrote in his memoir. “I wanted to be Heathcliff.” He wasn’t completely delusional. He knew that no one in their right mind would cast a 55-year-old white Englishman as a teenage “gipsy”. But he had a solution. It wasn’t to cast someone younger or dial up Tom Cruise and ask for some of the fetal stem cells he’s been stockpiling. His solution was to produce the thing on his own so that he had the last word on casting.
He assembled a stellar crew. His former bandmate and Olivia Newton-John collaborator, John Farrar, composed the music, Tim Rice, who co-wrote several of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s most successful musicals, penned the lyrics, and Frank Dunlop, who founded the Young Vic, took directorial duties. The casting choices were less important because this was no regular Wuthering Heights adaptation. This version was to be called simply Heathcliff, and despite a lot of scripted wailing from Helen Hobson, who plays Cathy, none of the other characters register.
Despite the supergroup of artists at the helm, things went terribly wrong with Heathcliff from its inception. Where Kate Bush managed to create a sound and lyrics that evoke the tone of the novel (“How could you leave me / When I needed to possess you? / I hated you, I loved you too”), the same cannot be said of Richard’s version. While the lyrics delve into the darkness of the subject matter, the sound of it is, well, the Cliff Richard sound. Nearly all the numbers are shimmery, synth-heavy ballads so benign that they practically wipe your brain clean of all thought or sensation, the sonic equivalent of a very effective lobotomy.
The choreography is more milling than dancing, and even the way the actors move through each scene without the musical numbers is strangely circumspect. At one point, when Heathcliff ventures to India (this is not in the book) and confronts the local monarch with a pistol, the man does a tiny wave of his hands to indicate that he doesn’t want to be shot dead at point-blank range. This is pretty much the extent of the physical work.
The biggest problem of all, of course, is that Richard, who has spent his entire career denouncing the drugs and alcohol-soaked antics of his peers, simply does not possess the darkness required to play a grade A bastard. Even when he beats his wife, he may as well be lightly swiping her with a velvet glove for all the violent rage it imparts. He does take strides to slip, chameleon-like, into his character. The scene in India includes a lot of hookah smoking, which one can assume is the famously drug-averse Richard’s shorthand for utter moral degradation. For his audience, this must have been the equivalent of slapping a sign on his bronzed forehead reading “NOT CLIFF”.
The acting comes into its full glory during scenes of plot-driven drama, such as when Mr Earnshaw falls down dead after lightly cuffing his daughter or when Cathy appears to perish randomly, without ailment. Rocketing up the plastic stone steps of a Yorkshire promontory, Heathcliff delivers what Richard called his most affecting lines of dialogue.
If it wasn’t for this moment, this musical might not be worth remembering, but skip to the end of the trailer (or watch the whole thing if you’re trying to prove something) and wait for Richard’s delivery. “I cannot live without my life,” he hisses, “I cannot live without my sooooooooouuuuuuuuuul.” That last word is bellowed several octaves above comfort, and it’s a choice that turns what could simply be a bad performance into a virtuosic one. Richard is not an actor, but my god, is he a performer.
Heathcliff was predictably panned by critics, who dutifully called out the ropey acting, stilted choreography, and overall tedium. But the pop star knew his audience. Posters for the show featured the heading “When Reviews Aren’t Good Audiences Know Better,” followed by a list of dire quotes from critics and claims that half a million tickets had been sold anyway.
Why this shining example of flamboyant theatrical tosh has been forgotten is a mystery, but it deserves to be celebrated. We don’t have to pretend it’s good, but we should all admire the guts and originality behind it. What other pop star at the peak of their powers would do something so daring and misguided? JLo’s This is Me… Now was a self-serving vanity project in which she burnished her usual persona at great monetary expense.
There was no jeopardy in it, and with Heathcliff, we got to see a pop star try something completely insane that they had never done before… we can only hope that, by excavating this deliriously strange relic from the dregs of the ‘90s, we might inspire James Blunt to embark on a musical version of Oliver Twist in which he plays the titular child, or Susan Boyle to star as the lead character in a genre-bending adaptation of Annie. The possibilities are endless. (Lily Hardman)
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